Why does everyone want to run a marathon all of a sudden?
I’m disgusted. Truly disgusted with you all. People are searching for their nearest run club and trying to calculate the cost of Hoka shoes and a Fitbit watch. You all make me sick. Tinder and Bumble weren’t enough for you, so cardiovascular activities are where you thought you would meet your future spouse.
It’s been two and a half months since the London Marathon. Firstly, congratulations to everyone who ran in it. I can’t begin to imagine the sweat, stress, and strain that you would have had to endure to complete such a great feat. Congratulations on raising money for such great causes. What a momentous achievement.
Now I’ve got that out of the way, I want to ask, why are we all running? I don’t get it. My Bible says that the wicked run when no one is chasing them, so I’ve decided to sit this one out.
The “run-demic” is sweeping through the UK at alarming rates. This infection is impacting people of all ethnicities, backgrounds, and social groups. Be on the lookout for the telltale signs. The first symptom is downloading the Nike Run App (but may present itself as Strava in some cases). Then, the infected usually cannot resist the urge to brag about their newfound pastime to anyone who will bear to listen. The definite sign and nail in the coffin is someone signing up for the 2025 London Marathon. At this point, they’re too far gone and there’s nothing you can do; they are beyond saving.
And on that note, I regret to say that I have indeed fallen victim. I’ve done it. Yes, I ran… a marathon.
Well, sort of. I just did a 1k run before work to see how it feels. I pulled my hamstring, sweated through my t-shirt and burst my left lung. This isn’t it people. A simple 7-minute run and I was about to meet my Maker.
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Jokes aside, I find it intriguing how everyone has taken to running. Not only does it align with the “unbigging our backs” agenda for summer but it wasn’t on the cards at the start of the year for many of us.
I find that there’s a lot of beauty in deviation.
For many of us, university and education were a common end goal and vantage point that we could all aim for. But afterwards, it’s almost as if there's nothing left to pursue. There’s no pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. No end goal to which we can measure our success in comparison to our peers. After tertiary education, it’s kind of up to you to carve out the life you want for yourself.
Post-21 life is filled with “random” extracurricular endeavours to occupy the void in our calendars that we left behind after deserting our childhood talents and activities. You won a Jack Peachy award in school but now you have a podcast. Makes sense. Failed child prodigies are now searching for anything to replace the hours they used to spend practising for whatever game, audition, or recital they had next.
These days I’m collecting side quests like infinity stones. Hobby hunting, if you will. By side quests, I don’t mean side hustles. I mean we create all these new goals and adventures to give us the same momentary sense of euphoria that we had when we completed education. The same buzz we used to get from not failing our midyear mocks is there when an Instagram reel we posted at 3 am on a Monday with no hashtags gets more than 1k views.
Life gets hectic. Days become decades and minutes become millennia. It’s hard to keep track of the time. Once you reach a certain age, the benchmarks in life can pretty much be getting married, buying a house, having kids, planning for retirement, and then hitting the bucket.
Life in all its linear and monotonous glory can leave you quite lost. Quite empty. Searching for a bit of excitement.
That’s why I dyed my hair back in 2022. Just something different. It’s why I have to stop myself from drafting my resignation letter, sending it to HR and escaping to mainland Europe to join the circus. Anyone hiring?
And maybe that’s where these run clubs come in. A non-harmful, nondramatic, nontoxic way of being different. Being someone different.
I’m sure there’s something about working months towards a marathon or hitting your PB for 5k run times that changes your whole outlook on life and yourself. These quests are what keep us alive. Keep us sane. Keep us from thinking that we’re all in the matrix.
“Do it for the plot”
Like a character in the latest Netflix series, sometimes you have to do things for the plot. Just shake things up a little bit. Show life that twists and turns make for an exciting journey.
This year I’ve fallen in love with playing paddle. Set myself a new challenge for the number of books I can read in a year (which I’m currently failing). Next month I might try this terrarium-making class that I saw on TikTok. Who knows?
As I Grow Older, I try to add more plot twists to this never-ending saga that is life.
I’ve come to terms with the fact that adulting can be both a struggle and quite boring at the same time. A new hobby, a new interest/obsession, or even a new personality here and there can add some razzle dazzle to our lives.
I’m learning that there is beauty in deviation. I’m learning the importance of completing my side quests. I’m learning to be random.
Guess I’ll see you all at the next run club meet-up (I’m joking – God forbid).
Love, Peace, & Blessings
Abs
Heavy on the ‘I’m joking- God forbid’! Great read, thanks again
You actually never miss! 👏🏾