we didn’t get it back in blood

new year, same woes

Before I start off today’s post, I want to say a massive thank you for all your support and love. Whether you just read the blog, share it on your Instagram story, send it to your group chat, subscribe, or give feedback. You all have my heart. What started as something to fill my time when I was unemployed has now become something that people actually enjoy. I promise to be more consistent this year. I’m learning to keep the promises I make to myself.

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This time last year I released a post called “we’ll get it back in blood”. It was an optimistic outlook on 2023 and a little encouragement piece to all readers about what was due to be a successful and fulfilling year. Based on the title of this post alone, I guess you can tell how I thought the last year went. I had to double-check the clock at the 31st Night/CrossOver Service/Watch Night service (whatever your church calls it) when they allegedly claimed it had reached midnight. My trust issues wouldn’t let me believe it. I’ve watched too many movies to know that we could all have been living in a simulation and could have just gone back in time to 00:01 on Sunday 1st January in the year of our Lord Two Thousand and Twenty Three.

This post is for those who didn’t have an anecdote or triumph story of overcoming and combatting adversity to give during the testimonies section at church. If you had a good year, please grab a seat at the back and try not to make too much noise, the rest of us are trying to heal in silence. But in all honesty, 2023 wasn’t too bad. Some really good highlights. Made some good connections, the first time I’ve ever been employed for a whole year, my brother got married (but some of you still can’t tell us apart so I’ll take the congratulations on his behalf) and did some really cool stuff. Flew to Rwanda on a mission trip just after my 24th birthday, which was probably one of the highlights of my year. There's something about unashamedly sharing your faith day-by-day whilst trying to beat the neocolonialism allegations that just gets your adrenaline going.

But I can sympathise with those who had a rough year. As Marvin Sapp said, “never would have made it.” When you’ve been hurt in battle, it’s hard to lick off your wounds, collect the remaining fragments of your pride and pick yourself up for the rest of the year. As you grow up, it's harder to rebound from each and every setback. No matter what the motivational, microphone-wielding warriors say, you can’t always respawn after every knockdown. After a while, it starts to take a toll.

How do you have a fresh start when you end up with a rotten finish? Many have opted out of New Year resolutions and goal setting, because “what’s the point?” I get it. I don’t intend for this post to be a “get back on your high horse” kind of think piece but just some snacks for thought.

Miles not Milestones

This stems from a conversation I had with my big boss, LS. Was very much grieving the past year because I felt like I’ve worked harder than I ever have but don’t have much to show for my efforts. She reminded me that it’s not all about reaching checkpoints, gaining power-ups, and advancing to the next level. Life isn’t a game of Super Mario Brothers. Sometimes it’s just about taking a step forward, every single day.

Think about life in miles, not milestones. Not only does it lead to less disappointment but allows you to appreciate how far you’ve come and value the journey.

Keep that in mind when planning this year and reflecting on the previous one.

DNS vs DNF

Fun fact: When I was about 8/9 years old, I did gymnastics. I was 3rd place in my region (in my age group) and was so good they told me that I could go to the Olympics one day. That has absolutely nothing to do with my next point, but I’ve been wanting to say that for a long time. Back to important matters…

If you’ve ever watched Athletics, you’ll see that if a runner doesn’t make it to the starting line, next to their name is a DNS – meaning did not start. But those who ran the race and fell, pulled a hammy or just couldn’t be bothered to cross the finish line received a DNF – did not finish.

I’m not encouraging quitting or giving up, but I would rather have a DNF over a DNS any day. I was eavesdropping on a conversation the other day where people were mocking those who start Instagram pages for cooking/baking, launch a podcast, or create a TikTok account for some sort of motivational content. After a few heavily decorated cupcakes, a couple of episodes on Spotify and a handful of videos, they’re done. The page is dormant. Every time you ask the owners, they promise they’ll make a triumphant comeback soon. Every once in a while, you’ll see a post coming from the page, just enough to convince you to not unfollow them just yet. Then after a while, the cobwebs set, and nothing is heard of them. The owner takes off the @ from their main Instagram bio and removes the links from their Link Tree.

I’m laughing because this was me. Eagle-eyed followers realise that this new As I Grow Older Instagram account (you can follow here) is built on the remains of the old Words of Goad page I used to have (if you know, you know).

At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter how many failed businesses, YouTube channels, or Instagram pages you start, it’s better than those who keep their dreams and ideas on their pillows or the depths of their iPhone Notes.

This year do not be afraid to start, and don’t be too hard on yourself for all the times you did not finish.

@chukaclipsIts all plot #story #fyp

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As I Grow Older, I’m starting to realise that hope doesn’t kill, regret does.

I would much rather celebrate failure than stagnation. A staggered journey rather than a non-existent one. I hope we can all dust off the cobwebs of the past year and venture towards greatness in this new year. Let’s lay to rest the mistakes, missed opportunities, losses, and overall disappointment of last year. If you haven’t already, I would recommend resources such as the Year Compass (here) and the 12 Week Year (here - would encourage you to listen to the audiobook which comes free with a Premium Spotify subscription) if you’re looking to have a healthy and introspective reflection on 2023 whilst creating steps for a productive 2024.

Happy New Year people, until next time.

Peace, Love, & Blessings.

Abs